Discovering my own sparkly "Jesus" pin

The premise behind the name for Welch’s book, Rhinestone Jesus¸ started with a pin the author wore every day through high school. “People could see I was a Christian because I pinned on my sparkly symbol of faith, my rhinestone “Jesus” pin, nearly every day; my identity was pretty hard to miss.” (Introduction xiii).

She talks about how donning this piece of Jesus flare practically shouted at everyone who she was and what she stood for. But then Welch goes deeper and talks about the trials in her life where she really learned what it means to be a Christian when your life isn’t so sparkly and your relationship with God is put to the test. Her realization was that pinning a Jesus pin on and calling yourself a Christian wasn’t enough.

This idea really got me thinking about my own relationship with God. I might not wear a rhinestone Jesus pin but lately I have been questioning how superficial of a Christian I actually have let myself be. I pray every night and thank God for his blessings, ask for forgiveness for my sins and talk about what happened that day. I treat Jesus as a bedtime chore rather than a relationship that deserves/demands constant communication. When something amazing happens I don’t thank him in that moment. When something is hard I don’t immediately look to him for help. It’s only later, an afterthought. And I don’t want my Christianity to be an afterthought any more.

One quote that really stuck with me at the beginning of this book is on page 4 when Welch says “Christianity wasn’t about all the things I did for Jesus; it was about coming to know Him better and making disciples.”

Which brings me to my sparkly Jesus pin. How much of my first mission trip was a calling to serve God and help his children, and how much of it was for me? To feel better about myself, like I’m actually doing something worthy? I’m realizing there is a huge difference between selflessly serving in the name of God, and serving my own agenda to appear to be a good person.

I sound like I’m being hard on myself perhaps, and please don’t get me wrong; my selfishness is not the reflection of the group I traveled with or the wonderful work they do; it is simply a direct reflection on where I was in my life and my walk with God at that time. I went to Ethiopia under the pretense that I would be saving someone and come out the hero; in reality that trip saved me. It woke in me a strong desire to love and serve others, not for the glory it would bring me or for the self-satisfaction I would gain, but for no other reason than because He told me to.

“When you serve the least of these, you are serving me.”

A very close friend of mine suggested I read Rhinestone Jesus recently and I took her up on that. This book so far has opened my mind and made me ask myself hard questions I didn’t let myself ask before. If you haven’t read it I HIGHLY recommend you get a copy today. Kristen Welch is a Christian mother, wife, writer and missionary who talks about how her journey with God is in no way what she expected. I feel that my faith and my relationship with God and my passion to serve has grown in new ways since I started this book and I hope if any of you read it you get something out of it as well.

The nerdy student in me never really graduated my 11th grade English Class, (thanks Ms. M), and I have to highlight, write notes, ask meaningful questions, and do reviews of these kinds of books when I read them. One thing this book taught me very early is that it is easier to grow in God when you have relationships with others trying to do the same. I thought as I prepare for my vision trip in October it would be a good idea to blog my journey with this book and hopefully start conversations with those who read it about how I/we can say “Yes to God when sparkly safe faith is no longer enough” (Which is the description of Rhinestone Jesus)

I didn’t make it through the prologue before this book made me cry. It wasn’t necessarily sad tears or pity tears, but more tears of guilt. Embarrassing, selfish guilt that I didn’t know I had in me.

"A majority of the residents were small, unsupervised children. They called out to us, “How ah you? How ah you?” hoping we would put something into their upturned hands. We could see by their swollen bellies that they were malnourished. Their faces were filthy and covered with flies, which they didn’t bother to shy away.
It was a hellhole, not fit for the living.
I began to cry and couldn’t stop. I wanted to shut it all out. I was angry with God. “Where are you? How can you allow so much suffering?”
Then I stopped and closed my eyes. I saw God’s finger pointed at me as He asked my spirit the same question: “Kristen how can you allow this?” In that exact moment, I knew my life would never be the same.”"

That sentence right there: “Kristen how can you allow this?” made me fall to my knees. We blame God for the injustices of our world but we do little or nothing to help them. How can I ask/blame God to help feed the hungry and save the orphans when I am sitting on my leather couch in good ol’ safe Missouri letting ice cream melt in a bowl because I am still so stuffed from dinner? It’s no fault of their own that those orphans were born where they were, just like it makes me no better than them that I happened to be born here. God loves us the same.

If my sister was hungry, I would feed her. If she lost her job and needed help with money I would take care of her. Why am I not doing more to help my brothers and sisters around the world then? Why am I letting my closet grow and my bank account swell when those things could save one of my brothers & sisters lives? How can I show the world that we are all related? Every single one of us children of God?

Pictures from the past

 I'm reminiscing from my last trip and getting so excited to go again in October. I expect this trip to be completely different, and that excites me and scares me at the same time! As of now I know nobody else going on this trip with me, and that intimidates me a little to be honest. I am trying to get over my fears, knowing that this is what God is calling me to do.


Just because I'm feeling nostalgic though; I thought I would share some of my favorite pictures from last time.



Here's a picture of our whole group. It's amazing how quickly you bond with the people you live with during missions work. I wouldn't trade any of these wonderful people for anything!



This is my sweet little Tigist, the girl I sponsor through Children's Hopechest. She goes to school at Trees of Glory, an hour or so outside Addis Ababa. It was so neat getting to meet her and her siblings and see firsthand what my donation does for her each month. She's such an amazing girl.

 


I'm going back!

Most of you know I traveled to Ethiopia a few years ago on a mission trip. While there I fell in love with the country, the people, and their rich culture. Since then I’ve been trying to find ways that I can do more to help this amazing country. I’m so excited to announce that I’m going on a Vision Trip in October with Children’s Hopechest!

A vision trip is designed for individuals who want to potentially sponsor a community. On a Vision Trip, participants visit mostly unsponsored locations for the purpose of evaluating how our church or community can become a HopeChest sponsoring community. Each HopeChest carepoint takes in about 150 children and educates them, and with their sponsor money they are fed, clothed, and medicated. It gives these children just a few less things to worry about and helps them focus on what children should be allowed to focus on: being happy.

I currently sponsor a little girl named Tigist at the Trees of Glory carepoint through Children’s Hopechest and I can’t rave enough about this company; I know exactly where my money is going and am so proud of the work they do. I actually got to meet my sweet Tigist on my first trip to Ethiopia and see first-hand what HopeChest has done in her area. Now I want to go back and help in a different way. On this trip we will travel to multiple places around the country and see where we can START a carepoint. We would partner that care point with this community and help them grow, in God and in everything they do. At the care points I visited on my first trip their sponsor communities have helped to build libraries, wells, give the children new shoes, and many more amazing projects that would not have been possible without Hopechest. I want to give these gifts to other deserving children and Ethiopian communities now.

I’m writing to you to ask for your help, not just financially but spiritually. Please be praying for me and those accompanying me on this journey that we are safe, and that we work as hands and feet for the Lord.

The trip will end up costing around $2,500, unfortunately most of which is plane ticket. Please don’t feel obligated to donate, but if you’re able it would mean so much to me for your assistance. You can send cash or checks to me at 2610 N. 32^nd Street, St. Joseph, MO 64506, or if you feel more comfortable you can donate online at my trip website: http://www.gofundme.com/HannahGoesToEthiopia

Thanks so much for your support!